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Relationship Values 101: The Ladies Tell All

The spotlight is now on the ladies for the second edition of Notebook Confessions. Again we are talking up relationships, but these confessions are gonna get deeper as Team YHM flips through the pages of our dusty diaries from the past.

We grabbed our pens and inked down all the deets from young women who are dishing up relationships values we should live by. These quotes are not like the cheeky lines delivered from your favorite chick flick about the perfect love. Take a look at some of the fab ways these beauties are making sense of…love.

What are some helpful tips & values you think girls should keep when in a relationship?

Georgette, 27 – Love you. Come filled with more than enough love and happiness within yourself. Oftentimes, we go in EXPECTING someone to make us happy.

To some extent, yes that should happen, but if we get it right the first time, we would be overflowing with so much love and happiness for ourselves, that we have more than enough to give away and share with the ones we’re with.

Keisha, 21 – Do not give up your identity for a guy. Allow your guy to complement, not complete you. He should add value to your life in ways you can’t, but not be your life. Just the way Ne-Yo sings in Fabolous’ Make Me Better. “I’m a movement by myself, but I’m a force when we’re together.”

Jannel, 21 – Never compare your past with the present and future. They are two completely different people.

Casey, 20 – Girls need to remember to maintain their own identity when in any relationship. Bonding with someone over similar interests is wonderful, but don’t lose yourself in the process. Keep some interests that are special just to you.

Caitlin, 23 – Date night is always needed. Just because you have already won over the person you’re with, doesn’t mean you should stop trying to show your love. For example, I and my boyfriend are HUGE burger lovers so we make it a point to go to Red Robin once in a while and have a “fat night”.

We eat the worst things possible and come home and lay on the couch. It’s absolutely great.  Every guy loves a girl who can eat like him and you’d be amazed how food can bring a couple closer.

Lisa, 25 – Don’t try to change someone. Human beings are not your science project. Being that we can only master ourselves, we oftentimes get mad because someone didn’t do something we wanted them to. I throw it back to this quote by Jacob Braude.

Consider how hard it is to change yourself and you’ll understand what little chance you have in trying to change others.”

Lauren, 21 – Too many girls are quick to start using ‘we’ in every sentence. “We like this” or “we want to do that.” A relationship is made up of two individuals who need to keep their individuality.

Nicole, 23 – DO NOT be an overbearing, looking through phones, checking Facebook messages, calling your partner 20 times while their out type of girl.

Anya, 22 – The most important thing I learned from my previous relationships is to never go to bed mad at one another. Whatever it is, talk it out.

Edye, 22 – Compromise is good, but so is trying new things. If there’s something you really enjoy don’t give it up because he’s not into it. You can do things on your own or you can try to convince him to do new things, just like you should try new things too!

Kasey, 22 – Communication is key. When you are unhappy about a situation in the relationship, express your feelings as calmly and as rational as you can. Be patient, but also know your limits.

Paige, 21 – I need someone who is going to challenge me to be great every day. If you are not growing in a relationship, then what’s the point? You should be with someone who motivates, pushes, and encourages you to better yourself. Not better yourself for their sake, but for yourself- because they want to help you be the best you that you can possibly be.

Karen, 19  Be prepared to work hard, cry, scream, laugh, and sacrifice. Love isn’t perfect, it’s not like the movies- and it’s taken me some time to realize that. It requires a lot of communication. Be open about your wants, needs, dislikes, and likes. 

Wow! That was a lot of great advice to take in. Every relationship is different so you have to know what you want and go after it. Of course be patient, safe and honest with yourself when it comes to love.

Be sure to tune in tomorrow for notes on choosing the “It Guy!”

Consider our new section your online journal and share your thoughts with us. Let’s talk more relationships or skip to shopaholic problems.

What do you want to see next on Notebook Confessions? Send us an e-mail at editorial@yhmmagazine.com!

By Yegide Matthews

Photo: YHM Magazine Archive

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